ManoLow-Blow @ SOL 6-9-06
-Johnny Sticks
Perhaps when this kid saw some cutie fellating a beer bottle and getting dry-humped by her girlfriend, he saw it as an open invitation to, as Javier the bouncer put it, “get stupid with her”. What he got from her was a well placed kick to the head. A kick like that is such a rare sight in fisticuffs involving drunks, especially when it comes from a girl.
The incident didn’t sit too well with this fool, or with Javier. After he got tossed from the club he whined that she kicked him for no reason, and begged to get back in. After that wasn’t happening, he went around behind the smoking area and tried to convince his friend to take a run at the bouncers, saying to him “C’mon go over there and make some trouble”. This kid must have really been wrecked menace to believe he was even going to look at Javier and company the wrong way.
Now, in case you’re reading this, listen to me kid. Liquor is kind of like creatine, it only makes you feel stronger. I know, you’re probably a colossal 115 lbs with that massive chain on, but you’re as intimidating as Clay Aiken. Being a tough-guy is definitely not in your cards besides the fact that you pick on girls and get rocked by them in return. Nobody likes a bully, so just be yourself and do you.
And to you Mrs. Jet Li: It’s cool you defended yourself, but don’t complain about getting groped when you’re offering more breast than Perdue. Moreover, you’re hanging out in a neighborhood crawling with more molesters than the Boy Scouts. There are better ways to get rid of an unwanted suitor that don’t involve leaving a stiletto print on his head. At least you didn’t kick him in the balls, which would have been a waste, since he probably doesn’t have any.
Diverse and beautiful faces were seen in every corner of the club. Like last week people came out and packed Sol to capacity despite the rain and made it an awesome party. The drinks were mixed to perfection, and the music was hot, which as you all know, is the perfect recipe for a bangin’ party.
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